To write or n̶o̶t̶ ̶̶t̶o̶ write

I thought about something while I was in a cab in a frenzy to reach railway station to catch my train, something about writing and the dream to take up writing as a profession. So I was passing by streets, people, objects and I noticed that I don’t have very good observation skills, because if I had to describe to someone what I was passing by, I would not do a very good job. I would probably say I passed by shops that were selling a variety of things from suitcases, to electronics, to some restaurants and some street vendors selling prasad. It was raining lightly and the road was wet, with the road being slippery, and a moderate traffic, also, the road was bumpy and with construction going on, it seemed like it would take forever to reach the station. Anyways, coming to my thoughts, I thought I don’t think I can become a professional writer or to clarify I don’t think I would achieve that kind of success with writing that I could quit my day time job and take up writing full time as a career, and by writing I mean writing stories, fiction, mostly.

This thought filled me with despair, and I felt that I am too just another software developer, who is not even good at her day job. I thought maybe the reason I am not good at it because I might be good in something else, like writing. And I have written barely what 10–15 stories (fiction/personal experience).

The thought was a humbling one. It made me realised that maybe I am just running away from one profession to another. I mean I have spent 7 years studying engineering and 2 years working in IT. On the other hand, 0 years have been spent studying writing or doing professional writing. So how do you expect to become a writer overnight, or become good at observing and writing those observations on paper well.

I think I have decided something that I am not going to think about when wil I become I professional writer, because maybe I don’t have it in me to be one and that is ok. But that doesn’t mean that I will quit writing. I am going to continue that and I will make my self better at it by sheer practice. I forgot one thing that writing is supposed to be fun, and you should do it as long as it makes you happy and fulfilling. No pressure to perform or to achieve a monetary reward from it. Because if you keep these expectations while you write then you will never be able to do well.

Writing is my hobby and I want to keep as it is. Do it just for fun.